  
Isn't the EEC eine wunderbar thingy, herren. Ariolasoft, der maison du ware du soft, has brought out der Eurocomputergamen für kinderspiel.
Werner, Mach Hin!(it means Werner, hurry up!) is the first manifestation on our shores of German comic hero Werner. This man is much taken with beer, motorbikes and dice, and your task is to help in exploits related to all three. There are five games on the disc (four on cassette). The first is called, um, cough, Diddling with Werner. There, I've said it now. It's a dice game (what else?), involving 13 beer mats and some aluminium cups. The object seems to be to force beer mats on an opponent by outbluffing him as to the results of a dice throw. Werner, in this game, is a very large cartoon face who frowns, leers and peers suspiciously at one and all. The next game is a bit closer to my heart. With a snappy title like "Who will bring the biggest bulk of bottles to the party" (you should see it in German ...), it can't go wrong. Werner is taking four crates of beer to a party in his car, but various common hazards conspire against him. Who can honestly say he's never encountered flying melons, manic drills (wildgewordene Bohrmaschine), jack-in-the-boxes with condensor (hein?) and the omnipresent ignition key extractor on the road? All the above drain Werner of beer and you defend him by moving the car out of harm's way.
And then there's something reminiscent of the Generation Game, called Werner's Panic Trip. Werner continues along in his car, dodging flying melons, and has to pick up roadside objects. Some of these, like bombs, are more trouble than they're worth so a snappy decision is needed as the bits whizz past. Next on the itinerary - motorbike manufacture. In best jigsaw puzzle fashion you select pieces out of a huge pile of mechanical mayhem and produce a bike. As there's enough bits to make four or five, you have to have a keen eye for the right parts for the frame you've chosen. An attempt to make an inappropriate bit fit causes Werner to scratch his head in consternation. He then needs a bottle of beer to calm himself down, and if you run out of beer, then he's off. When you finally manage to piece together a plausible motorcycle, Werner leaps on it and drives away. But it has to pass muster, as two traffic cops cast critical eyes over it and cause trouble if anything's not just so. The last game (disc only), is the Drive Through Fog. Atop the motorbike, Werner whizzes down the autobahn. As fog closes in you're responsible for making sure that he doesn't impinge on any large objects (like lorries) that just happen to be sharing the road with him. With visibility variable, it ain't easy. ACU #8701 | 
